Who Did What
By David C.
One of the worst experiences I've ever gone through was when I was about eight years old, picture this.......
After church one day, since I still had ninety percent of my allowance, I decided to go to Phillips 66 to get a drink, maybe a small toy. Anyway, when I got there, there was something that caught my eye: a ''Catch It Ball''.
I then decided to buy it so I'd have something to play with on my way home. So I bought it and was on my way out when.....
''Wait a second, I guess I better toss my trash, plus I gotta take care of some business REALLY BAD.''
So off I went and I went right into the bathroom without seeing the sign above the restroom door. There was a big sign that said ''restrooms'' pointing to two doors.
''That's all I need to know!'' I said.
So I took care of business and while I was taking the wrapper off the ''Catch it Ball,'' there was this pounding on the door.
''One minute,'' I said.
So I then wrapped the Velcro around my wrist when it occurred to me......
''I can't play with this in the store,'' I said and quickly put the ball in my pocket, while the Velcro was still attached to my wrist.
I opened the door to an old lady who worked at the store. She stared me up and down and then looked at my arm and started yelling.
''You little punk! What do you think you are doing!'' shouted the lady.
I looked around to see what I might have done wrong. Then I saw it. Staring me square in the face. It was.........................A STICK FIGURE WEARING A TRIANGLE!
''Look at me when I am talking to you young man,'' shouted the lady.
''I'm so sorry it was an accident,'' I pleaded.
''They say that all the time!'' she protested.
Then I thought, 'This happens all the time?'
''Come with me,'' she said, latching her hand to my wrist. It didn't seem like she ever intented to let go, her grip was so hard.
She led me to the front counter and called over an officer who was having a snack.
(And for whoever is reading this story, he was not eating donuts so don't make any bad jokes about it. Thank you for your time).
''Okay boy, tell the officer what you did,'' commanded the lady.
I, being eight years old, was still frozen by the fact that she would call the police about this.
''If you won't tell him, I will. This boy was shoplifting!'' said the lady.
At that moment my blood went from freezing to boiling.
''If I'm gonna get in trouble, I want it to be for something I actually did!'' I yelled.
''If that is true, pull out what is in your pocket.''
I pulled out the ball.
''Are you aware that if you take something out of a store without paying it's shoplifting?''
''Are you aware that if you do pay it isn't shoplifting?'' I replied.
''Well it's a little too late to pay now,'' she snapped.
''I don't need to,'' I said.
''Everyone has to pay! You are no better than anyone else!'' she roared.
''No, I've already paid,'' I defended.
''Well then, let's see your receipt,'' said the lady in the smuggest voice I've ever heard.
I started fishing through my pocket to find the receipt.... it wasn't there! Then I remembered that I had thrown my trash away.
''I've already thrown my trash away,'' I said in a sad voice because I knew I had lost.
The lady looked as if she had won the lottery.
''No,wait. Here it is. It was in my other pocket,'' I said knowing that I just saved my butt.
The lady looked as if she had spent all her lottery money.
''Okay, I believe that we all learned something today. So I want you to stay out of the girl's bathroom, and I want you (he looked to the lady) to apologize to this boy,'' said the officer.
So I got my apology and went on my way. But by the time I was halfway to my house the string on my ''Catch it Ball'' had broken. I had had a heck of a day and it wasn't even 12:00 yet.
I learned that there are certain things you can do to not to look suspicious. And look all over and around doors before you go in.